Light in the Darkness

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I just have to share about how I had an amazing feeling in therapy today. Words cannot express how much I love to be able to see God’s hand working in my life. Often times, I feel like he’s forgotten about. I just feel abandoned. I’m sure that I felt that way the whole time I was at UTSA and for the most part now.  I just can’t understand why God gave me/allowed me to have/ hasn’t gotten rid of this eating disorder. It makes me so angry. But today, something about that changed.

Today in therapy, my therapist admitted that she’s not really suppose to share faith with patients, but there is just something about me, compelling her to do so. She admitted that she prays for me because my situation is one that is difficult to overcome. As soon as she said this I felt like I couldn’t thank her enough. Is was at that point I realized that God is STILL and ALWAYS is looking out for me. He hasn’t left me this whole time during my struggle. She let me know that it was okay for me to have some doubts, be upset with God. She explained that it was living out your faith. I love that!!! It was such a good and moving point.

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I’m so glad that I finally decided that I needed help and that I needed to go to therapy. Just by that one comment  I learned that there are in fact people who care about me and my well being. I’m so, so, so thankful for that! It was at that moment, that I just knew I was in the right place. That’s a feeling I haven’t had in a very, very long time.

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